Jboyce’s blog

I Am Insufficient

October 29, 2008 · 2 Comments

2Cr 12:9 And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Did you read that? 
Read it again. 

Paul would rather boast in his INABILITIES! He would rather talk about how incapable he is except for Christ. In fact, I remember Paul saying that one church he went to- he did so with few regal words and only the power of God. 
Let me get this straight…Paul is secure in his insecurities because in God works better when you dont get in the way. 

This note isnt for you- its for me. Im having a hard time bowing my head to others who i deem less fit than me. I have a hard time living in a quiet confidence of Jesus Christ. I would much rather boast, and take people down a few notches with my incredible knowledge in humility. Besides, being quiet never gets you noticed. Right? The quiet ones are the ones who God will use greatly- behind the scenes…like thats a bad thing. But Paul. PAUL. The greatest apostle of all is excited that He has weaknesses, so that Christ can fill them. 

Im wondering sometimes if I get in the way of Jesus too much. Maybe its not blatant pride, but I want to be loud enough that people dont know that i have insecurities, that i am incomplete, and that Im broken both by Christ- and the world. I want to be loud enough that people notice what I can do- not quiet enough that everyone is aware of what i cant do…yet, thats exactly what Paul is saying. That if he is going to open his big mouth, that he will open it only to tell you how messed up he is…in order to show you the incredible power of God. 
Sometimes i think that all our skills and abilities- the very things that God wants to use, keep us from being used because we cant shut up about the gifts and talents God has given us. I just want to be used. Thats it. I know im not the first choice. Im not the best choice. But i want to be chosen nonetheless. 

Here is my prayer: Father, please reduce me…to Christ.

Categories: Christianity

2 responses so far ↓

  • lori chapman // November 3, 2008 at 6:03 pm | Reply

    Jordan–
    Thanks for letting God use you to minister to me.. I am a member of MtZion in Utica and have been pressing in to God in regards to having Him help me so that I do NOT get in the way and His will be done in my life….I want to be used in ANY way that God wants to use me to…thanks again, and I will be praying for you too….Lori

  • Philippe Jean // February 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm | Reply

    I hear ya man! i’m just glad He’s using me at all. We need to come to the point that He doesn’t even need us but that rather He CHOOSES to use us, not even because of who we are but because of who He is. Good stuff man!

    -Phil-

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